When was the last time you felt incredibly happy? This is an important question and what matters is not when but why you felt so elated. What conditions created that state of being and can you bring that into your now moment?
The answer, in my case, would be last year and the reason I felt that way was because I experienced freedom of being, love and admiration mutually shared.
We didn’t incarnate here just to learn dammit! We are here to experience a spectrum of emotions. And happiness is one of them. It can’t just be all work and spiritual lessons! And being ethical and woke 24/7.
Understand, our Lockdown is in full effect. No smokes, no alcohol, limited travel and well, I still can’t perform. I am far away from friends and a bit reluctant to leave my Mother alone. So I end up sitting with all this grief, all the drama around our corrupt government that basically stole money meant for Covid relief, to the tune of a few hundred million rand’s I think, and a pissed off country! Oh and the blackouts are back also. Then there’s all the spiritual realizations on top of it. Look, it’s a bit much to deal with at times.
So.. where’s the happiness, the joy I ask myself?
Balance in my case means more fun. More laughter, more surprises from the universe, things I don’t see coming. Realistically, I can’t control any of that. Yet, I can open myself to the idea and ease up a little bit. That being said, I decided to complete all the books given to me as gifts or pass them on to the Hospice shop if they don’t spark anything in me. I need books that cause me to dream a bit more, inspire and allow my imagination to roam more freely.
That’s why I posted the song by Muete on FB and said that I can’t wait to be on the dancefloor amidst a sea of people with whiskey, a cigar and a lot of very delicious, straight men I intend kissing. Okay, I left out the kissing bit. And to be fair, usually I do have juicy men around me in a club….they are just usually gay. So I end up watching them kiss someone else or dispense love advice!! Oh the irony of it all….
More music! I need to dance more while I cook and clean and go about my day. I need to find an exercise where I push my body to exhaustion, there’s a certain thrill to that also. And plan a birthday party! Usually I enjoy staging a performance on Nov 6th as I am never disappointed. What if I planned an escape weekend for myself and a few people or a specific someone? Now that sounds like fun! Something magical and absurdly strange!
In order to express emotions that are more balanced I need to find a new balance first and perhaps spoil myself here and there.
Ah, yes….I need to find fake white orchids, small and big ones to place in my hair. And a beautiful sunflower flowing skirt and perhaps a kimono. Something unique, extraordinary.
It does start with you. Not an expectant you, but an excited you. Before anything else rocks up in your life. So have more fun already, make every moment of your special. Make it count and have a damn blast. Why worry about death when it will come anyway? Why entertain doubt if not to disprove it eh?
Here’s my happy song. And it’s killer..