The accusations that have come my way over the years range from “you are too airy fairy and all over the place” to “can you stop being so diplmatic?” Or “other people do not view the world the way you do. Be realistic”. Geuss what? Each and every single damn accusation is true. Spot on. I surrender! Lock me up now and throw away the key!
Thanks to all the deaths endured and a pandemic, I can confirm that I do not view the world many others do. I enjoy being a nomad, expanding my world view and musical lexicon as I move, and I dig hanging out in the ethers. As that’s where the Music comes from. But those I love and care for….know where to find me and in what state. They can predict with reasonable accuracy my next move. As bits of home are scattered all over the place. They are my talismans in the dark.
Perhaps, for the first time I feel free in my skin. Even if circumstances are not ideal. Even when I do not get the desired response or outcome. Only one question intrigues me. ” How honest am I being with you in this very second?” Grief rewired me. Walking around with my heart shut just isn’t an option.
The new album, entitled Fool’s Gold, was named so with great intent. Put aside the fact that my name means Golden for a second, the Music deals with falling in love, getting laid and telling people to fuck off and go to hell. Surface emotions. The lies we allow others to cling to as we dance and have a good time. Scared of revealing too much. Loving too hard. Falling too quickly and turning into a damn mess on the floor.
Kissing. Fucking. Drinking, those are just doors we stumble through in order to find….love…acceptance…meaning. When the truth is we all desire deeper connection, places of safety. Let’s just be frank for a second, yeah? We were all a flaming red flag somewhere along the way! Dodge as fuck and slippery.
So yeah, I am having fun with the new Music. Yet, I look forward to a warm bed. A silent home. Books as far as the eye can see, a fridge filled with lovely things to eat and the voices of those I love. As golden and warm as the sun in the sky. We humans are not as complex as we enjoy pretending we are.
Welcome the accusations and then decide if any truth resides there. After all, the poison contains the cure.