Category: Category 1, My Blog

My set list is finalized for the two performances next month. I am relieved above all else. Next week I am in CT, spending a great deal of my time with Matt and  friends as I prepare for more and more music.

There are songs I decided to not include on what will be my 6th album. Are they good songs? Yes. Do I want to allow the energy of those specific songs to seep back in? No. Everything is energy.

For example,  it took me an entire year to figure out  the depth of my emotions, express it and…. was met with what felt like indifference. Or perhaps it felt that way as my Father just passed. That, at a time when I could only  breathe in short bursts and kept offering cups of tea like a mad hatter. After Daddy died indifference was the one emotion I could not allow anywhere near.  Grief sometimes feels like madness. So the chosen music is balanced. There is no Great Longing. No indifference. Only what is.

An energetic almost alchemical process takes place on stage, in my thinking. I allow the music to move through me. All my last minute feelings, my deep inhales. Underneath the music there’s an untold story of aloneness, a bed filled with books, pens and paper. The audience receives my music and the untold bits unknowingly and offer me their exhaling. If I am lucky we  leave feeling lighter and a bit more free.

Here’s a link to purchase a ticket. Only 50 are available per performance. Protocols are still in place.

On a side note….the book Melisander! What Are Dreams? – written by Hillel Halkin was read in one sitting. I have pieces of paper strewn inside the book, parts I want to photocopy and send to someone in a letter. In fact, I caught myself inhaling the pages of the book upon completion. There were bits I skipped, it was too painful. Things were said, hurtful things in the heat of the moment. How can one allow oneself to feel so deeply and make so many mistakes? I knew the answer, of course. I fell asleep close to 2am. This is a book I would like to own. And it reminded me yet again – see to your own heart before expecting an answer from another.