Category: My Blog

We have all visited that dark place called my-life-is-going-to-hell-and-I-don’t-know-what-to-do. Without exception. Some call it the dark night of the soul. This is what I learnt while visiting that seedy hotel where the bed lined is shaded in all hues of despair….

Breathe. Try to not fuck out….or if you do…be around safe people. And breathe slower.

Challenges is what we all face, and we face them for a reason. Forget the idea of karma. That evil temptress that whispers so seductively, ‘You deserve this. After all, look at what you have done.’ Ignore her, even if she has a point here and there. The reason is simple. It doesn’t help one bit.

I can say cliche things like…this is a lesson, perhaps even a test. There is some kind of silver lining somewhere. Again, another notion, while meaning well, does not serve. Usually, that  kicks in after the fact. After we have overcome whatever obstacles we faced. But during? While you are in the thick if things? Never.

Get up in the morning. Focus on what needs doing. If your mind is racing focus on your body. And sweat it out. Tire your body so sleep comes. I will never forget how smart my sister was when I raced into her home, so upset about something I can no longer recall. Man, I was swearing and badly. The  way one does in Afrikaans, which is a rough and guttural language, especially in the mouth of an angry woman. My sister looked at me, handed me a paint brush and said, ‘Paint, and tell me about it.’ By the time the wall was painted, I was calm and tired. I walked everyday for months after my father passed. And it helped…

Accept the fact that you, my friend, are an idiot. Meaning that you can no doubt find millions of ways of making an already tricky situation worse. So dont, as that is in your power to do. This doesn’t mean you no longer fight for what you believe in. Or transform into Mother Theresa. It also doesn’t mean you allow another to treat you badly if you were in the wrong. Life isn’t suffering. It is meant to be joyful. Only this part you are dealing with now….well, it’s tricky.

Enough preaching.  Be good to yourself. As every part of you inherently is. Never forget that. Hope can be found everywhere.