So my theory is as follows: people are mirrors. Sometimes those mirrors are outdated or ( and this is seriously juicy) a possible ‘other’ path is presented. Have you ever met an individual who showed, through their life choices, a path so strange and odd from yours? Of course, my gut response was of the huge ‘fuck off and leave me alone’ kind. Without realizing I was being given a gift of sorts, that’s all. I cannot help but think my reaction had to be severe in order for me to pause and reflect.
Often I am amazed at my own unkind thoughts. Thoughts I was not even aware of where doing the moonwalk to bad music and drain pipe whiskey. Lowkey hustling with huge smiles, as they pillaged and plundered. I question and discard these thoughts once aware. As I do, individuals have been removed or removed themselves organically. There simply is no place for them. Or new people entered. As though responding to a silent call.
We all have moments of weakness – when things slip through. I had a few recently! And did I felt guilty afterwards, but then I remind myself. It was a moment not years of bullshit and unhappiness. Even if I endured years of nonsense so what? All that matters is I do the best I can.
The antidote, my antidote is Music of course. Music, sleep and the sun. In a few hours I am off to studio once again….and feel well rested. Ready to face the world!