Looking at the music I have chosen for the new album made me realize a few things…about myself. Crazy things in fact.
I was writing my way out of my marriage years before I left. Hence the Mafia phase in my writing, for example. I felt so helpless that I had to cut and maim my way outta there, song by song. Then I realised I really like the way badass feels on my voice..and kept on with my evil ways.
At its core the new album deals with all the kinds of love and how it lights one up. Hence I said it deals with Love, Murder and Myth. In between love and murder there’s myth, the stories we tell ourselves about who we are or who we think the other is. It can go either way at the end, one just never knows! Hehe.
I realised that the men I wrote music for and deeply loved, all inspired the same thought or charge within me. Look, it’s gonna sound crass but it goes like this. ‘Fuck yeah, you hot piece of man thing! I am gonna have my way with you, go home and write the best music I know how to because you are fuckin gorgeous inside and out! And when you walk into a room you light up everything inside me! Who needs the damn sun eh?’
That. Emotion….is where music comes from. It’s big and filled with excitement, longing, rage and so much desire. And the rage isn’t personal. Rage at the state of the world yeah. Again, very Scorpionic. There’s no middle way, no lukewarm.
Currently one of my best friends is listening to everything I have written or am considering. He knows my music better than most and knows I hate repeating myself – words or Melody lines.
I have not slept yet. Music, music, music, music. Making it and singing is about the best feeling ever. Why would I ever stop eh? I hope you have something that makes you feel so excited and joyful! That causes you to give up sleep, dreams, men and good times. I also hope it is not tied to a person. Trust me….that always ends badly.
Be the source of your own bliss. Go out and be your own Badass Self and try not to be scared of losing anything in the process. Like Rumi said…everything you lose comes around in another form.
Now here’s a song that is never going on any album. I realised that I can’t always please everyone and am tired of trying doing so. And that’s why I have zero fucks to give. Hehe. Oh this song. It’s just voice and going nowhere but was a fun way of blowing time.