Afrika Burn. Where to start? It was the sheer absurdity and extravagance that struck me most. The outlandish colors,the clothing, the art installations, the people I met along the way,the food I ate, the boys I kissed. And seeing it all change at night and during the day. Of course I got lost! Obviously. First and last night. Completely lost….and was rescued also!
Life before the Burn in 2019 was….cold in places. Hard to figure out and difficult to navigate. All I knew was the sound of eggshells. All I had was my voice and no way of being heard. I left the Burn changed. Free. Every day, I decided, would feel this good. And it has…for the most part. What has changed since then? Everything.
I had a complete fuck out moment at the Burn, as one does. “Why am I here?” I asked myself and then Leslie-Ann. What was I hoping to achieve or experience? Now that it is over…I am still at a loss of words. Sure, I have some great stories to tell about kissing one boy every now and then for three days until I realised why and stopped. Then I carried on dancing and talking to random people about everything that matters. Or doesnt.
I cried at the silent burn of the Temple. I left behind two words. Forgive Me and one name. I cried on the way back. What for? I wish I knew. I have not lost anything in the last few years. The people I know and love give so much of themselves. But when I got back from the Burn…all I wanted was Matt and so texted him first. He is my Human and our long conversations helped me immensely after my father passed. So I need time to decompress with Matt. Then home. Ah. I am off to Jhb next month. I finally can spend time with my daughter…a few friends and sing.
If anything, I learnt to trust over the last few years. What of love, you ask? Love is literally all around me. Yeah. I am meeting many new people and enjoying them for who they are. That’s about it. In fact, I got all the clarity I needed. Along with the reassurance that I am not mad….after all. Surely, that’s enough eh?