I love vintage clothing and anything that has a bit of a story to it. I don’t need a reason to wear two specific items on stage – my Mother’s ring and my granny’s blue bauble necklace. My Mother’s ring has not left my finger for the last few years. A reminder to be true to myself if you will? It’s at this junction I hear my daughter’s voice going off in my head. Mother, you think too much and no one cares what you wear. I wonder about that also. Why do we no longer care as much about people? Or do we only care when we are motivated to do so? When we can benefit from them?
Back to what people choose to place on their bodies. It gives me insight – who they choose to be and reveal. Or what they aspire to be and hide. Why do I like turquoise and green so much lately and why does the smell of Bulgari Rose perfume move me so. What am I silently trying to tell the world about myself eh? And why all those flowers in my hair? Knowing those answers has given me reason to pause.
Again the voice of my daughter sounds off in my head. ‘You are way too impatient Mother…’ It occurred to me I find it easier to let go of good and bad memories in my past lately. This is a huge step. It’s so seductive to think of a something or someone and travel back to that moment, light a cigarette, pour a stiff whiskey, listen to the band play and lounge in the recent past for a while. It’s seductive and dangerous! I only visit to write music and then limit myself to two memories of my past at a time…
Fuckit, I just don’t want to make the same mistakes again. It is that simple. So the past literally stays with me. I wear it so I can touch it and never forget. This worries even my Mother slightly. Possibly because I take longer to get dressed now! I took a look at what I value and noticed that not one single item was kept by anyone I have no regard for. My past remains with me to me by what I chose not to have in my surroundings also.
I won’t throw a barrage of deeply meaningful quotes at you, as I usually do at the end of a blog post. Besides I am a tad bit too lazy to do so now. How about some meaningless advice instead? Some fat to chew on eh? Not everything that smells good tastes good – that includes men and food.