At least once every two months I have a small anxiety attack. This blog is way too personal. Would, let’s say, the person I was referring to feel that my description of them or a set of events was characterized as fair? In fact I think of this often as I write. When I write music I am not interested in fairness, it’s emotional resonance or emotional truth that matters more.
There are a number of songwriters I work with. Lionel Bastos is my favorite as I used three of his songs on various albums. First, the melody just works and the way he articulates emotion fits me well, like my favorite dress. Andre Scheepers writes for many people and his goal is simple. He wants to make money. So we work together for certain projects and hell, I have known him for ages. However, the determining factor for most of the music I chose from other people comes down to one thing: does it sound like something I would say, feel or think?
Yesterday I spoke to my daughter and shared how we all get lost in different modes of thought and philosophies while we search for answers. Sometimes, I told her, all one has to do is what you…resist most. Stop trying to find answers and delay what needs doing, what requires action. I have wasted so much time thinking and writing….when all I needed to do was pick up the phone, ask and get the answers I need.
Writing gives clarity of thought but it’s also a delay tactic. I know I need to…for example…find another publishing company, an agent and a manager. Not from South Africa. Instead I worry about songs that I know I won’t place on an album or try to think like a producer which I am clearly not. I mean have you heard all the scratch tracks I put out? Terrible quality.
I love Radiohead’s music for the denseness of sound, the richness of the various soundscapes sparks all manner of emotive chords and Tom York’s voice topples one over the edge. Their music inspires me to search for sounds or imagine them. Ben Harper showed me how to be truthful when writing music. Still,I wanna write a trance song or dance song that sets dancefloors on fire. Can you imagine a crowd of thousands just jamming out to a dance song that threatens to overwhelm their entire being? Okay, see….that is what I love about being on the dancefloor. Writing music is so much fun!
Adventure! Yes that’s what I could do more of. I also need to….chill out. Perhaps watch more comedy shows and hang with people who are not constantly monitoring the state of the world and spiritual realms. Someone I can talk to about…shoes and bladdy earrings. Someone who makes me laugh.
Anyhoo, I think I will stay in bed and read today. And try to search for the link so I can hear what Ben Harper listens to. Dude was a guest dj on a radio station. The app was not available in our country making it impossible to listen.
Distraction. Escapism. A place to shut everyone and all the voices out. Isn’t that what everyone needs now and then? And yes, I had chocolate ice cream for breakfast and might just take.a ride to get more…
Here’s the song the blog post was named after.