I forget how afraid people are. Perhaps, spending the majority of Lockdown in a small picturesque town mitigated the amount of fear I was privy to. Being in a slightly bigger city has shown me another side of the coin. People are scared. Circles are kept small all the while fear hums beneath the surface of their skins…

Whenever confronted by this low level hum, I ask myself, ‘What is it I fear?’ Why else would I be able to hear it? If not to confront the same droning sound I easily can ignore when home?

Alas, onwards we march. Now we have to focus on selling tickets to the live stream of the event. I am being thrown into areas I do not usually focus any attention on. It is daunting yes, but what can one do…but roll with it eh? How else to learn, to stretch oneself? And yes, my band and I agreed…our performance on the second night was better and more together than our opening for Ben Harper.  The only way is up my people!

It is a beautiful day and by next week I hope to be home. Close to the sea and family. Just to process and regroup. In between that moment and now…the one year anniversary of my Father’s  death on Friday. But I will deal with that event when it arrives.

There are other ideas I have in mind. Projects to complete. Hell, an album I need to start thinking about in all seriousness. Instead of focusing on all the avenues closed to me, it is the gaps I should be taking a closer look at. Where and how can I find wriggle room? What can I make my own in the midst of all this uncertainty? Of course, I do have ideas…

One thing, one small step at a time. Breathe. Everything for a reason. Even the fear I can smell on people….and myself. One small step. One deep breathe. That’s all it takes, all that is needed.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *