We get what we need. I maintain this for a reason. Or perhaps the truth is I am getting what I need, after months of attempts to gain clarity. And what I needed was kindness, connection and warmth. Without the need to censor myself. I needed someone to listen. And listen he did.
This year old ways of being were left behind. I actively made different decisions. I cried and bitched and moaned….until it was done. Strangely enough who I ended up meeting suffered the loss of a parent a month after I lost my Father. I am convinced that this is one of the reasons we met.
And so we talked and talked for hours. Listened to music, laughed, hung out and simply enjoyed the intimacy of shared space. It has been a long good while since I felt at ease with someone. And I am not about to mistake that shared time as anything other than what it is.
While this blog post touches lightly on the subject matter of connection ….it isn’t really about him. More than anything it is an indication of a shift in my energy. And that’s what the real gift is.
I am no longer the same person I left behind in 2019…thank god.