Everyone knows that I only ever freak out about two things, (aside from family drama), getting lost while driving and when cooking. Thank goodness for whoever invented the GPS or I would have maps of every place in my car, filled with snapshots and notes to supplement it. I recall, (and don’t judge me for this okay?), parking my car at the airport five years ago and freaking out as I couldn’t locate it. So I called my friend who I dropped and he laughed. Of course, I went to the wrong building and thought my car was stolen! I hate getting lost and am more attentive now, thanks to that incident. However, cooking is another matter altogether.
‘Just chill out and put on some of Ben Harper’s music…’ suggested a friend. This after I discovered the amount of people I was cooking for! My best friend saying, ‘Auriol, you are not cooking for savages..’ did not help. Oh no, they are just some very accomplished academics and foodies, that’s all. I have eaten at their homes, I know about their standards dammit! Also, I was tasked with making a dish I never cooked or really tasted before. So, my freak out levels were rather high.
No, I said to my friend. Ben’s music can get me through the worse emotional trauma and is the equivalent of a great bottle of whiskey on a cold night. But right now I either need someone who is calm and logical or gangster rap to take the edge off! Luckily, Jody the Scorpio rocked up or I would be rapping along to NWA while food was being made!
It’s not that I can’t cook. Of course I can! My daughter and ex husband are still alive after all! It just doesn’t come as naturally as….writing, music and talking nonsense to people does. I literally have to write down the times when certain dishes will be prepared, the order in which they go into the oven and when it will be plated before I can relax. Also, I seldom eat the food I make…as by that time I lost my appetite!
I know, I know…I am a weirdo and that’s okay. We all have our kinks somewhere. Perhaps this year I should cook more and find music to get me through the entire process. There is no food left and no one has called to say they are sick, so that’s a good sign. I reckon I can rest easy and dive back into the amazing books I picked up at my favorite second hand bookstore, Bikini Beach Bookshop out in Gordon’s Bay. Shoooo.
Besides, all my friends know how I roll. They know my strengths and all are very certain that I cannot be trusted in a supermarket without a list of ingredients….