There are certain moments and things we don’t forget…
Every single person who called or I spoke to when my father passed. Even if we never spoke about death or grief. I made a point, after 2019, of calling or checking in with people. Even if they don’t respond. As long as they were aware of the care and regard I feel. I considered myself very blessed after my father passed and who remained at my side.
When Gilda’s husband, Doug, passed I couldn’t but help to notice who called, the amount of care she was treated with. Especially months after. Death does strange things to a family. It either binds or destroys. In the case of Gilda and my own family, we are so much closer now. Despite any of our differences. Or perhaps because of it.
Those I play music with. Or create new material with. Jusy how open to change were they, was I? How much compromise was involved? What did I learn from the experience? Was I happy with the music? I trust my band implicitly, and the trust shows clearly when we are on stage together.
Reciprocity means a great deal to me. The exchange of energy, time or resources. I enjoy those who share a similar approach the mutual exchange of energy. We walk away from each other knowing we shared an experience or place in time where truth existed. What if that is all anyone really needs? Small spaces in time where everyone feels safe and nurtured?
As my Mother once said, ‘Giving and receiving is one and the same…’ In this respect, I am lucky. In that so many people in my circle are solid, good humans. It took us all a while to figure out our lines in the sand. After 2020, I think we all know what and who may or may not cross our personal boundaries. We give and receive as much as we feel worthy of, I realised.
Any and all acts of bravery surprise me. Not bravery in the classic sense. The Mother who, gifted with superhuman strength in the seconds of her greatest need, saves her child stuck underneatha car. It takes bravery to own your heart, your mind, talent and body. Bravery to state unapologetically….this is who I am and is able to deal with the consequences. Others are encouraged by it.
Perhaps this is the new frequency we were always called to straddle as we go about our every day lives. Previously, emphasis was placed on our mental facilities. The logic we employ or the slights of hand even. My heart was always littered with love and too much music. Hence, I ignored it, my mind most days and regret very little.
What if it is the heart and what resides there that matters most? The heart that draws everything like itself towards one? The open heart where experiences and people manifest as if by magic?
What if, the purity of our heart’s desires is the answer to conquering our deepest fears? What if that was true? What then?
The answer still remains as is. Listen. Breathe. Find balance and go! Move towards what enlivens and brings joy. And if we remember JOY means…Just Own Yourself. Maybe then, finding what we need and calling it towards ourselves isn’t that hard is it?
The point I am making is this – how people treat you or you treat another….depends on you. You and the meaning you give it. At the end of it all – we are only human. There is so much we simply don’t know.
Still. Listen. Breathe and find Joy, wherever you can.